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Thread: People of COSTCO

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
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    Default People of COSTCO

    People of COSTCO

    1. The entrance traffic jam
    Did you ever notice the congestion at the entrance to Costco? This is where they place the $3,000 4K Super Amazing Extreme 65" televisions and other high-margin merchandise for status-conscious consumers. Customers wheel in their gigantic shopping cart and stop right in the middle of traffic, causing a traffic jam. Their eyes tell the story. Each of them is fantasizing about lounging in front of that jew tube, in a recliner, snacking upon fried mozarella sticks dipped in ranch dressing with their fat sausage fingers and gulping a 64 ice cold Coca Cola. Living the good life.

    2. The clothing cattle
    Move yourself back to a corner of the store where the entirety of the clothing section is visible. Allow your eyes to move slowly out of focus. Observe that the customers rummaging through the clothing look like herd of bovines fattening themselves on a plain of fresh grass.

    3. The cart leaners
    Want to spot the folks who will die early from diabetes? They are the adult and middle aged people leaning on their shopping cart (on their elbows) for support. The shopping carts at Costco are in good repair. They don't take much effort to push even when fully loaded. The fact that they cannot walk 1km/h without leaning on a support indicates a shortened lifespan.

    4. The impulse shoppers
    The middle aged couple convincing themselves to buy a three-way articulating ladder which is clearly below the weight rating required for their mass. Some get lost, carefully justifying each exhibit as to its need in their life, instead of evaluating what they need and shopping for it with diligence.
    I am a white cisgender alpha male establishment figure

  2. #2
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    Dec 2012
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    Don't forget the people who have lunch there by making a couple of circuits of the free sample tables.

  3. #3
    Join Date
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    Nazi!
    "...What’s wrong with murdering innocent children if it’s for a good cause? And it is a little bit funny.” – Mikemikev, 07-19-2013, 02:30 PM

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    3,657

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    Quote Originally Posted by FuriousGeorge View Post
    People of COSTCO

    1. The entrance traffic jam
    Did you ever notice the congestion at the entrance to Costco? This is where they place the $3,000 4K Super Amazing Extreme 65" televisions and other high-margin merchandise for status-conscious consumers. Customers wheel in their gigantic shopping cart and stop right in the middle of traffic, causing a traffic jam. Their eyes tell the story. Each of them is fantasizing about lounging in front of that jew tube, in a recliner, snacking upon fried mozarella sticks dipped in ranch dressing with their fat sausage fingers and gulping a 64 ice cold Coca Cola. Living the good life.

    2. The clothing cattle
    Move yourself back to a corner of the store where the entirety of the clothing section is visible. Allow your eyes to move slowly out of focus. Observe that the customers rummaging through the clothing look like herd of bovines fattening themselves on a plain of fresh grass.

    3. The cart leaners
    Want to spot the folks who will die early from diabetes? They are the adult and middle aged people leaning on their shopping cart (on their elbows) for support. The shopping carts at Costco are in good repair. They don't take much effort to push even when fully loaded. The fact that they cannot walk 1km/h without leaning on a support indicates a shortened lifespan.

    4. The impulse shoppers
    The middle aged couple convincing themselves to buy a three-way articulating ladder which is clearly below the weight rating required for their mass. Some get lost, carefully justifying each exhibit as to its need in their life, instead of evaluating what they need and shopping for it with diligence.
    Shit Wal-Mart shoppers say. ^^^

    Lingolution: noun. Term that refers to the intentional misuse and destruction of language and grammar consequent to the use of computers -- because it's fun.
    Obamalution: noun. Term that refers to the irreversible Haitianization and descent of sivowyzasheeon consequent to accomodating blacks as equals in civil society.
    Evilution: n. term given to the phenomenon that most people are just more comfortable in Hell.

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